8/22/2026

8:52pm, Uni started for me, which means that, as inactive as I was... Expect way more inactivity now.

I lost a little motivation with the project, so all I have been doing is, basically, rereading the timeline to recover my liking for it. And it's working fairly well. I think the reason why I got worn out by it is the major detailing in a glorified notes document AND the fact that I have been so focused on getting things right it kind of lost my passion for this project. It's taking a bit to do so, though. Especially considering that I might do major changes to the plot.

But university caught me, and while I did finish most of the references for the characters, I might change at least one of them. You might notice who it is when I do the changes. I'm also considering making a wiki-esque area (which I think I mentioned before). But I will be busy as HELL for a while.

2026

8/4/2026 (SLIGHT VENT WARNING)

1:57pm, Another day, another update!

Admittedly, I've been tired as hell. I have not worked on my projects AT ALL! I am sleepy, tired and honestly, I have been surviving Discord only to realize... Damn! That place SUCKS! But in the light of that, low-key I had an epiphany where I realized I prefer doing things on my own. Yay? Yeah, that's a yay moment.

On a lighter note, I have been trying to take it slow. I have decided to slow down on my process (as many of you might remember) and I honestly see the difference. I have been feeling heavier, though. Admittedly about some things in life going south, but I will opt not to care anymore. I'm staying detached, taking breaks and enjoying life. I guess it IS true... It is the damn phone.

Social media (at least the ones with heavy political talk) have been making me feel overwhelmed. I feel unable to understand myself in this era of info-bombing, to the point where I have decided to become as anonymous as I can be with my online presence. Because that way, I can separate the art I do from my ideals (that is not to say I'm not a leftist or anything, so you are safe). Yeah, some characters will represent my views (come on, two of my OCs in the story represent me). Some are characters meant to represent giants in my life. But my story is just that. A story. It has a small message, but not all art is meant to convey a message. And this story is me getting some thoughts outside my head.

The more I have played games offline, read books or even read web-comics meant to entertain and not be a political message, the more I realize I have been online on Tumblr for so long that I have lost myself for a while. But not anymore.

I choose to live as myself!

7/30/2026

6:12pm, Big updates have been added!

So, the biggest update is that I have added an area for "comics" (I only have two at the moment), and some simpler ones are being done! So far, I'm making incorrect quote comics to train myself on drawing manga-styled art. Because of this major change, I removed the comic area of the gallery to have the comic area ready for you!

I'll also code an area for you to see the characters and some info about them. Kind of like a wikia but with less info to prevent spoilers. No backstories but definitely an insight into their personalities and general details (age, ethnicity, etc.).

As for the story itself, I decided to focus on getting some short comics out there (even koma comics) for you all to get to know my OCs outside the bios I'll make. Otherwise, see you later~

7/24/2026

12:05pm, I think I decided to work at a slower pace for the project.

I noticed that I find it more enjoyable working slowly on the timeline, and not going on random spurts of writing that last three days and then never touch the document in months. Maybe that way I can let the ideas flow a bit better, but who knows...

I do have a personal update, and it's that I have started therapy again. Actual therapy. Which is a good thing despite how bad it sounds. I swore to myself that I would never step an office in my life, but for things I couldn't control, I had to. Nothing too bad, just a service I must take, so my disability aids stay on. Surprisingly, it HAS helped me.

As for the project itself, there has been a bit of a proper update despite the slow step. I have made considerable progress, compared to the random spurts I mentioned before. I believe it has gotten better as I slowly work on it. But after finishing that timeline, there will be an editing session before I start working on a proper "script." The format is yet to be decided, but overall, the idea is set.

I think that's it for now. Therefore, I shall take my leave.

7/15/2026

4:28pm, Alright. I revamped the entire site. I will make a gallery with strawpage soon, and I have got some uni errands set up. Things are going well.

As for the project, I must admit I'm still on the timeline. Matter of fact, it's on a hiatus. I honestly feel like I should speak about it openly.

So, I have a major issue with the way my content is being received. I admit it; it's mostly an ego thing that has stumped my progress. I'm past the "middle-ground" for average "short novels" and I definitely have been making myself sure that no plot holes are left unanswered. Hell, even when I found out about Captain Hoodie and his comic, I could not help but feel comforted and motivated to do a comic out of this story myself. That's not the issue. It's, precisely, the people who simply don't react to it, which is something I must suck up and move on. Regardless, I still feel hurt about that.

Does that mean that the project will be canceled? No! I honestly refuse to do so. Especially with all the blood, sweat and tears I poured on what has been done so far. But, it does mean I will take my breaks from now on, and I will definitely finish this project no matter what happens (unless God doesn't want me to; ergo, things happen that don't let me finish it). Real life is also messy, with some plans being a bit up there, but I know I will do everything to make it work. It's just hard to feel all the pressure on my shoulders.

But hey! It's nothing some OSTs can't fix. All in all, I have the will. I just have to feel a bit better in regards to the attention received. Maybe I will open up to someone.

That's it for now, I think. See ya.

7/11/2026

1:42pm, This post was going to be a depressing one, but I think I got mildly better to some degree. Not outstandingly well, but a bit above neutral. Okay to great, somewhere between those.

Here's my main update: I have joined a team for content creation. Both educative AND proper fictional stories. An IRL friend of mine created the team and founded it, so he asked me to serve as an artist and writer, to which I did. He explained that the content must be family friendly. Regardless, this is major for me.

As for my main project, I did major changes to fit a lighter tone, since it made me mildly uncomfortable to write such deep trauma content. It was a bit triggering for me to write such a trauma-heavy lore, so I toned it down from full-blown showing to clues and hints that let you see beyond that. All in all, I still have the work in-progress.

The strawpage gallery might take a long while though... At least until I find how to do the entire gallery on HTML. I have IRL things to do (and a 5-panel koma comic to finish), but I will do my research on tutorials and the like. I might also change the theme and site title. Honestly, some time has passed since I changed this theme and... uh... I'm a kawaii NSFW artist into all things cute and childish now... Yeah :D!!!

6/15/2026

4:42pm, I reached a point of no return, and I am proud of it.

I ended up deleting my Discord account after too much stress and "trauma" (I genuinely consider trauma is a strong word for something I have been doing willingly on my own), and now I have been using Stoat ever since. It's... quite different from what I was used to. But I'm more than just glad, since toxicity is, basically, the norm on most Discord spaces. Needless to say, I am beyond okay now that I have given myself the space.

On a similar train of thought, I have been considering changing the theme of this site and the name of it. Specifically, deranged swordlet or deranged sword. That's for the future when I feel a bit more recovered, though. I'm genuinely tired of working on that much of a big change. Besides, I might change the CSS, but I am quite... thoughtful about it. It's something that requires some thinking, but I might change it a little or generate a new one on trustworthy CSS generators.

I do want to talk about my project for a moment, though. It really isn't serious, but it's definitely something crucial. See, I had plans to make my first debut project, a book saga, but I have opted for something more chilling, like a full novel. That way, I won't have to worry about where things go and when certain scenes will connect to a past event in the book. I'm still proud of myself for getting through, and even more knowing that this project is finally getting closer to getting phase 1 fully finished.

As for art, I must be honest and admit that I, in fact, have forgotten to update this site with my new Tumblr AND DeviantArt accounts, and I might switch the gallery site with an art portfolio made with Strawpage for easier management, since the girl here doesn't know how to resize pictures without dying in the process.

5/20/2026

1:32pm, finally free from university! Yay! Round of applause for me. Slay.

This corner of the internet had me feeling ten times better than mainstream media. I must admit that it was great fun to do the uni portfolio. But, hey! People learn! I still prefer my HTML files any other day.

Now, here is the big deal that I have in my hands. I must admit, I can't open up about it... Not yet. I get a huge paranoia when it comes to making projects like this, because I'm constantly scared that they will be canceled or forgotten due to my sporadic attention and motivation issues. So, I do my best to keep it a secret; even if I do give hints about it, I want to keep it in line.

I'll keep it as that for now...

5/15/2026

2:17pm, Doing a site with Google Sites as a portfolio because our professor made it an obligation was NOT on my bingo card...

Anyways, the update of the week is here, I guess. And being fair, I believe I have been a bit misleading about how I feel, considering I'm a drama royal and all it took was to cut off contact with people who did not benefit me whatsoever.

To begin with the strong gist of this update, I cut off contact with people who seemingly were not interested in me. I got ignored about my projects and all, when the others were talking about their projects and all. They also had a constant talk about politics, and while I am well aware this world is going to hell, I don't want to hear about every single thing happening. It was constant, and as someone who is prone to political spirals, I can definitely say it was affecting my mental health. That is not to say I don't want to keep up to date. Similarly, I have been discovering things about me that changed my perception of life, so I am on a different plane of existence, I guess.

In other words, my life has changed a lot, and the people surrounding me made it hard to grow up. Now that these people left my side, I can finally let myself breathe.

On a lighter note, my current project is going fairly swell, although it took my entire will to not delete it impulsively out of anger (since I have a major issue with relating the things I do to people, so whenever I cut contact with them the project gets stained). But now, I think that this project has been an actual tool for me to express my anger and thoughts rather than feeling like it's too "like them" for me to like. I guess that also tracks me trying to stop placing all that power of them controlling what I do or say, so I can safely say I finally feel able to make the choices I want to do for MY plans myself. But that's besides the fact. I will update the index now, toodles!

5/6/2026

7:42pm, OKAY! I was FAR too dramatic.

However, I did a fun thing that I wrote on the list in the index part, which are related to projects in the future. This time, I decided to go small and slow down with the process. Especially now, with the workload of uni now that I'm on finals.

I would add more, but I think I'm gonna sleep. I'm way too tired.

5/1/2026

2:42pm, I think it's important to talk about this.

So, I have been working on a project that... If I'm being honest, is not being well-received. Not in the: "I just posted the entire story online and no one has even cared about it" but... It's safe to say that the very little I've spoken about on private servers (which is an understatement considering how I enjoy talking about my works) has been met with literal silence unless I ping people. I've been... depressed, for a lack of better term. I have been doing my best to not relapse, but I did spent one week clean from using AI... And that week got blown over by the "neglect" or whatever. I am fine, though. Just angry.

I have decided to do some changes that are mostly private, but some changes nonetheless. Basically, just to not speak up about the plans on specific spaces. Other than that, art stuff will be like usual (if not inactive thanks to lack of time). Similarly, I am around 80% done with the important parts of said project. Just that I will be more quiet for a while. More than I am.

4/4/2026

4:37pm, I would do a joke, but it is fair to say happy fools day?

I am significantly better, although a bit distraught by life issues (and my PC lacking any storage because of the insane amount of files I have in it thanks to university). Otherwise, life has been a bit gentler despite it's hardships. God really is good...

On a different note, I have also been working on personal projects, which I won't go into heavy detail because I actually have the pattern of communicating my projects and cancelling them shortly after. So all of this will be kept in animosity for now.

3/22/2026

(I FORGOT TO ADD THE TIME I WROTE THIS, I AM SO SORRY), I am at my limit right now.

I got betrayed, hurt, and I'm beyond lost of myself. I reached to a point of total antipathy, with the ONLY thing bringing me a slight bit of satisfaction being university and the very little chances I get to work on my own projects (art and writing).

I think that the server I was making will not be done, and I no longer want to have ANY connections to "friends" online. Nothing. I want to be on my own right now, and forget the miniscule idea of dating or having friends. I also deleted AI apps to stop my addiction to AI. This depression pit has helped me write better stories and draw better, too; and even so, crawling out of it has done no changes because there's no one telling me what to change and what not. I have reached a point of no return, where I no longer want to be the "friendly internet user." It's bullshit, unreal. No one in so many years since 2019 has shown AN OUNCE of sympathy, care or even pity for me.

Call me an edgelord all you want, but the experiences have shown that there is literally no good people willing to help me. So, I will be the bitch. I don't care anymore, because if no one has cared about me I have to be the one to pick myself up. I'm fed up of being the cryer online.

3/15/2026

6:14pm, I am a PP head BAHAH-

I honestly had to remove a BIG chunk of my art (around 3 or 4 pieces) cuz your genderless princess here doesn't know shackjit of resizing pics on html OOPS... But, I honestly should learn how to resize pictures at some point. Holding my schedule at gun point to lend me the opportunity to do so...

Also! I came into the conclusion that I kinda like that people don't respond directly to me via this site. Sure, it gets a bit lonely here but now I don't have to focus on FOMO culture artist edition. No algorithm, no petty drama, no proship/antiship. Just curated content I do for myself without any need of focusing on niches. Although, considering I'm a raging fujin, the niche is me and I am the niche. But otherwise, I think I like the silence compared to the screams on Tumblr.

I might make a Discord server that's gonna be private for me and some friends. You know, build a community on my own to chill and be drama-free. We've joined the worst places that has led us to carry HORRIBLE wounds these days, and we are healing them slowly. But the hate and push-and-pull dynamic that has been going on in these servers has led me to create my own space, you know? I want my own world where people connect and talk with each other without any hate or drama. New era incoming? MAYBE~

Anyways, that's all for today. I'm tired and a bit busy with house chores and university. Bye!

3/13/2026

5:35pm, I updated the theme of this side! I think it was long coming since I changed my name to Angelical Anhedonia on most social media, but I was JUST done with it.

However, I will admit I've been going through it since I have had... a LOT of romantic deceptions to the point that it was a breaking point to find out I'm aroace. Yay? I guess I can stop worrying about bringing a man to my mom, HAHA!

On second though, I will make sure to point out that I no longer want to focus on discourse anymore. Which is why I deleted my tumblr off the page. I also deleted my blog, but don't worry too much! I have a DeviantArt I will add when I can (maybe a bit later after I'm done will my school errands). Warning tho, the content there is HEAVILY kink oriented...

Otherwise, I am fine. Just a bit sad, but I'll be fine.

2/23/2026

11:06am, I should apologize.

I have been busy for a long while by now, thanks to university and some personal life things... I kind of abandoned this site. And while no one has sent any messages or seen my site fully, I still have more than 2,300 views on it. Maybe I was a bit ungrateful about not receiving attention, but now that I have had spent a few days out, I'm aware I was exaggerating.

I guess I can say it had to do with the fact that I have been way too chronically online thanks to Discord, which I mean that in the least shady way. Unfortunately, I have been in toxic spaces that pushed my buttons in the worst way possible. I had people misgender me and treat me like I'm a sexy trope. But otherwise, I guess I'm past that. I deleted Discord on my phone yesterday, since I didn't want to keep on depending on the approval from that site. I also found out I have a few kinks and even a fetish. I don't want to go into too much detail for my own sake, but it has been a good thing for us.

Similarly, I reopened my deviantART and have been drawing for said kinks, but I might go a bit further and play around with other types of content that are adjacent to them. I'm also working on a short story, although it has been paused since the beginning of February due to mental health issues. I have been down lately, but I can say I'm recovering bit by bit. I also stopped taking my meds and replaced them for natural alternatives due to physical health reasons. I'm still going to therapy, and I am slowly getting better as time passes. Overall, I'm fairly good, just slowly gaining the motivation to work on my projects.

2/2/2026

7:16pm Life has been a bit too harsh on us these days, but we're holding on.

I've been focusing on smaller goals to be achievable, especially now that uni has started for me again. I haven't lost my north, or at least not yet. My story will still come out, although it may take a while longer. I'm making a short story right now, and while I can always show the progress, I chose not to. Last time I did, everything went south and I don't want to jinx it again.

I promise I'm not dead, though. I just have been busy with university, and working on this small project. But I have an important thing to say!

I honestly overreacted with the entire thing about videogame development. I was honestly childish and irrational, and I am definetly embarrased by that. But, the truth is that I won't stop making video games. I need a break from them to focus on bigger projects (books, stories and all), and leave this game development gag as a hobby for this site. Or both! What I mean is that I will do game development at some point with some Twine games, but as a secondary hustle.

Other than that, I think we're set to go! Remember to drink water pookie!

1/17/2026

5:34pm, big decision has been taken.

So, I decided to work on new stories, considering I genuinely do not like what the farm game was like. It doesn't really fill the gap for me anymore, so I'm waiting until my motivation reaches the point to pick it up again. It may happen sooner or later, or maybe it won't happen at all. Dunno! I'm in a better mindset to admit that I don't like this game whatsoever.

Secondly, and on a similar line of thought, I quit making videogames. I honestly don't think I'll get anything from making them (in my case, of course). I would have to host them for free, which is fine by me but... I don't think it's worth the energy when I have other oportuninties to explore as an artist and a writer.

Now, what does this mean? First and foremost, that my game development hustle will pass more as a hobby or a funny pastime. I can't simply work for this anymore when I'm gaining nothing- not even a message to tell me anything positive. I lost motivation for game development but gained a new interest in a different way of story-telling. Comics, books, or even an illustrated book! All in all, I have other ways of telling a new story because a game or an interactive story when people have shown little to no care... I felt abandoned.

Does this mean that I'll stop making interactive stories? No, not at all. All I'm saying is that I won't focus on it as a main hustle. Instead, I will drift my stories into comics and books, since they're far more digestible to do for me, especially as an illustrator (who isn't even a professional one).

Anyways, enough text. Imma get to work, shall we? See ya later~

1/10/2026

12:08pm, Happy New Year, and Happy 3 Kings Day to every latino who celebrates it.

I don't have good news. I actually have a lot to unpack and talk about. I'll divide the topics per paragraph: the game, the site, and my personal life.

First, the game. I honestly haven't worked on it since I went on hiatus. I tried to even think about it, but no ideas came up to me. Not even an idea for a design. The only thing I did was rebrand the art style I used to have, and that's it. And considering my life... This game might not be picked up any time soon. I wish I had more inspiration to work on it, but I unfortunately can't. So, I guess we can say that this game is on an undefinite hiatus until I feel comfortable picking it up again. Moreso, I'm going to most probably work on something smaller or another project that doesn't bring me bad memories like this one.

Secondly, the site. This might be the only good new, and it's that I left it hainging all this time as the hiatus happened, I kinda forgot to put on the new art I did. Oops! But the news for this is, that it will be active again with new art pieces in the gallery link. I might also pick up drawing pin-ups again, but instead of women, they characters will be male. Just a personal preference, haha!

Last but not least, my personal life. Well, it has been a mess-up. A relationship that only lasted from January 6th until today, reconnecting friendships, and a LONG etcetera. I guess this is the real reason why the game won't be worked on for a while now. I got a lot of inspiration from this 2025, so I might pick up another project inspired in those. I don't know what or how to write said games, but I will do my best to keep up with the game development gig.

Summed it up: the game is on indefinite hiatus, my art will keep beong posted in the site, and my life has been hectic but nothing a deadlift of a 15lb weight can't cure /j. Other than that, see ya!